la prodigiosa sabiduría del señor kim
there are 3 types of people in the world:
- those who have enough to be self satisfied while sharing that energy with others. these people are natural givers. jesus? mother teresa? that one guy in your circle of friends who’s always helping others and giving back?
- those who have just enough to be self satisfied. these people are not natural givers, but they have enough potential in them to be happy with themselves just the way they are. this is most of us. …andd finally:
- those who leech off of the first two types of people. they are insecure, needy, and aren’t able to be happy without taking away energy from other people. common quotes include: “can you spot me a couple bucks for lunch today? i promise i’ll pay you back.”; “you can smoke me out this time, right..”; and of course.. ”hey let me see the homework that’s due next period.” those in this category are unable to support themselves. obviously everyone relies and depends on their friends and fam and teachers and mentors for support, but parasites in this group abuse the sanctity of these relationships by constantly asking for more. and more and more, without any intention of giving back.
weak individuals in the first two categories are easy victims for the leeches. to someone who’s insecure, a leech can be very attractive: the person seems capable of providing friendship, someone to talk to, quick popularity, an invitation to an event… it could be anything. but this imbalance of giving and taking can’t last. it’s unsustainable.
an easy solution would be to cut ties with these parasites, but we can’t bear the thought of losing “friends” who have been with us for so long. at some point, in a vicious cycle, our growing insecurities cause us to seek out more leeches. we try to please everybody, in hopes that they’ll give back in some way. but more and more, as the burden of these soul suckers increase, we can’t seem to meet our own demands. are you keeping up your grades? your family life? have you been jogging twice a week like you promised yourself? why don’t you go to church anymore?
it all hits us, all at once, all together: what the fuck are you doing to yourself. you’re spiraling out of control.
with this realization, we start focusing on our own lives again. we go back to studying. we start communicating with our parents and lil brothers and sisters again. no more giving attitude at work. we lace up our running shoes and resume our exercise regimens. sunday mornings aren’t spent sleeping in anymore.
but what about those leeches, huh? something’s gotta give. they sense that there’s something not quite right about us…. ..they’re not being taken care of. they’re being ignored. one by one, they drop off of us. suckers disengaged, they look for another host to mooch off of.
now here’s the important part: the “friends” that are gone now? for some of us, the mere thought of being alone is terrifying. we scramble to have them back. come baack to me. take my life blood away again. i need you. i need more dead weight. you’re needy, willing to give. they like that. they can’t get enough of it. they return. and….. the whole process begins all over again.
but for the smart ones, we realize that we can stop living for other people. we can live for ourselves. they could call us greedy, selfish, antisocial, boring. and they would be right. but there’s nothing wrong with that. we’re fine just the way we are. we can be alone, and it won’t matter, because we’re getting our shit done (: .
and the funny thing is, our real friends? just like our other “friends” who left, they notice something different about us, too. we hold our heads higher. our backs are straighter. our voices are calmer, steadier. our eyes look into theirs during conversation. we walk with purposeful strides. guess we got our swagga back. and dayummm is confidence sexy or what… <3.
homework? check. studied for next week’s test? check. went to the gym today? check. attending worship this sunday? check.
life on track? check.
“You can please some of the people all of the time, and you can please all of the people some of the time.. but you can’t please all of the people all of the time.” - Mr. Kim